The Emerging of the Mindful Parent
3 minute read
Parenting with awareness does not happen overnight. Parenting with awareness is also not found in quick-fix parenting books, how-to guides on parenting topics or anything outside of the parent-child dynamic. Trust me, I have tried.
Parenting with awareness or consciousness happens in a moment by moment experience and can only be recognized within those moments. Without every living the moment, how can we be conscious about it?
The true way to parent consciously is to be observers of our own behaviors when we are with our children. In this way, we can begin to be aware of our emotional imprint, our triggers from childhood experiences, and who we really are underneath the structure of control. The parent-child dynamic must shift to a more productive and healthy way to foster a relationship. Gone are the days where our children are beneath us and seen as incapable beings that need guidance. We, the parent, are the ones that need all the guidance we can get. The guidance comes from our children.
Sometimes I find myself repeating the same unconscious behavior despite my best intentions. This can be so discouraging for me, but I have noticed a very important shift. When I begin to live within the present moment and catch my unconscious behaviors, I can then expand my mind into a realm of consciousness because now, I am aware of my trigger. Becoming aware of my unconsciousness gives me the opportunity to confront the reason for my reaction and work on calming my inner child before the irruption of the emotional imprint.
Change doesn’t happen overnight; however, the consistency of catching the unconscious behaviors will allow for the foundation important to parenting the whole being in our children AND within ourselves.
Our unconscious mind is not the enemy. Instead, it is the tool for our consciousness to arise.
There is no arrival point to our level of consciousness. It is a lifelong shift: A true paradigm that needs working on day after day, moment after moment.
“To become conscious is to witness our consciousness, which progressively makes it conscious.” – S.Tsabary